It can be exciting to start a new daycare or preschool routine. However, many kids – and parents — have a hard time letting go. In fact, morning drop-offs are often very stressful, setting the tone for the rest of the day. Whether you’re celebrating your child’s very first day or your child is transitioning to a new classroom, drop-offs can be a time of tears, clinginess, and hesitation for both parties.
The good news is that drop-off struggles are normal and common, so you’re not alone. It just takes some planning and consistency to ensure a smooth process, so check out these tips on facing morning drop-off
with confidence.
Be Consistent
Keep up with a predictable morning routine to reduce anxiety and help your child feel secure and in control. Wake up early enough so that no one has to rush around, which creates unnecessary stress. Take your time eating breakfast, getting dressed, brushing teeth, and gathering backpacks before rushing out the door. When you create a consistent routine from day to day, your child knows what to expect and will be more likely to comply with your requests.
Know What To Expect
If it’s your child’s first day in a new school or in a new grade, take the time to talk about what their day will look like ahead of time. Step by step, take them through the routine, from arriving at the classroom to having lunch to getting picked up at the end of the day. Awareness will ease separation anxiety and give your child structure they can count on.
Keep Goodbyes Short and Sweet
Long, drawn-out goodbyes only prolong the inevitable. Children can sense your hesitation, and that will cause uncertainty for them. A warm but brief goodbye is always best, leaving them on a positive note with a little encouragement for a good day.
Come up With a Special Goodbye Ritual
Whether it’s a special handshake or a catchy phrase you say each morning, your child may benefit from having a ritual to look forward to each morning. It can even be a little drawing you made that’s been tucked into their backpack as a little surprise.
Bring a Comfort Item
Bringing a small comfort item to school may help a child who is struggling with morning goodbyes. Whether it’s a favorite stuffed animal, blanket, or family photo, these items can make the transition smoother for young children.
Stay Calm
It can be easy to panic when your child cries at morning drop-off. You may be tempted to scoop them up in your arms and bring them back home with you. But resist the urge. This stage is temporary and will pass if you approach it the right way. The last thing you want to do is turn around and walk away from them, especially when you see the tears rolling down their face. However, just remember that most kids settle down within a couple of minutes of their parents leaving.
So don’t be worried that your child is curled up in a ball in the corner of the classroom all day! They will soon be distracted by their friends, their toys, and their teachers. Put on a brave face, which will help your child feel safe.
Embrace the Wins
Celebrate each step of progress, from the big accomplishments to the small. Let them know how proud you are, even if all they did was let go of your hand a bit sooner than the day before. Positive reinforcement builds confidence and incentivizes children to repeat desired behaviors, according to Positive Psychology.
Communicate With Teachers
Talk to your child’s teacher if they continue to have difficulty handling morning drop-off. Daycare staff will be more than happy to work with you both on making this daily routine go smoothly, so everyone walks away happy.
Practice, Practice, Practice
For kids who are sensitive to separation, practice it in low-stress settings first. Maybe leave them with a trusted neighbor for an hour while you run to the grocery store. Mini-practice runs help reinforce the idea that you will always come back to your child, giving them the confidence they need to let go bit by bit.
Separation Anxiety Can Be a Sign of Healthy Attachment
You may assume something’s not quite right if your child protests at drop-off. But on the contrary, these displays are often a reflection of a secure bond between the two of you. They love and trust you, and are genuinely sad that you are leaving them. But with enough time, practice, and gentle words of encouragement, they will eventually understand that they are still secure and happy – even in your absence.
